Be strong, be tough, don’t cry – boys are bombarded with messages about being a man and the “male code” beginning around five or six years old. By high school, it’s second nature. But it can also be toxic. Because boys in America today aren’t doing so well. Compared to girls, they’re more likely to get diagnosed with a behavior disorder, dropout of school, binge drink, commit a violent crime, even kill themselves. So is that what it means to “man up”?